Harvest Time!!

The doctors had lowered my dose of hormones, good thing too because as I've been writing, I am not feeling fabulous lately. My breasts hurt, I can hardly drive without wincing at every little bump. And I'm soooooo bloated. I can't quite seem to be able to find a position where I'm semi comfortable. So, last night, I was allowed to eliminate Follistim from my daily regimen and lower the dose of Menopur to 75 units from 150 units. I was relieved as I was running out of potential injection sites (trying to avoid the bruises, which are darker today).

This morning I went in to the clinic for my the regular blood work and sonogram, where the doctor gasped over my ovaries' progress - lots and lots of eggs. So I inquired as to the number of eggs that he was seeing and he said about 25...um...which sounded a lot higher than what I thought they had said they were aiming for in the beginning. When I asked what the average number of eggs that were collected was, he said about 15. WOAH. I sure hope this couple will end up with a pregnancy! That's a lot of eggs!! Then he suggested that unless I was planning to get pregnant, I get on some serious birth control. He said that I would not have trouble having children in the future and that if I did, it would not be caused by me. It's nice to know that I have that ability. He asked how I was feeling and I went on a rant about the discomfort and the bruising, which he assured me was all normal and that it won't go on for long, since tonight I'd stop the usual hormone injections and take the trigger shot. That would make my harvest date 2 days from now!! Woot woot!

HCG - human chorionic gonadotropin - will trigger ovulation, about 48 hours after receiving it. The clinic will retrieve the eggs about 36 hours after injection, just before the eggs will be released from the ovaries. Unlike the others, HCG is given in the gluteal muscle in the upper buttock area. My instruction was to take it at 11:45pm. The needle is larger than the others, but at this point, I'm not really afraid of it. I needed to exert a bit more pressure to get the needle in, which wasn't comfortable but not that bad. It's been about an hour since the injection and my bum is quite sore - the kind of soreness you have after a work out. I also started taking 2 doxycycline pills a day - it's a precautionary measure against infections.

This means no injections tomorrow!! YAY!!! One more visit to the clinic before the harvest and then I'm done! I'm soooooooo excited!!!!

Wow...

For the past 4 days, I've been doubling up on Menopur and taking the same amount of Lupron and Follistim. It's too bad that I have to double the Menopur because that's the one that hurts. Oh well, I can take it, it's only for a few more days. When I saw the doctor on Friday, he said that I didn't even have a full week left - thank goodness, I'm so done with this. I'm uncomfortable most of the time, there's a lot of pressure in my stomach, which I notice the most when I go from standing to sitting or shift my position while sitting.

Now, with all the bloating and feeling fat, I've not been looking at myself very much. Last night, while preparing for this evening's shots, I yelped in shock as I discovered bruises around my belly button, around my injection sites. These aren't light bruises that you'd see after bumping into a table or something, these are deeply purple, ugly bruises, the hideousness significantly increased by the fact that it's in the middle of my belly.

To top it all off, I've had the worst night's sleep. I woke up around 3:00am, sweating and nauseous, which continued for a couple of hours (felt like a couple of centuries). I hope, I hope, oh I hope I don't have to go through it again tonight. Oh my gosh, I can't wait to feel normal again!!

Changes

So, I was crying watching silly movies for a few days. That didn't last for long. Shortly after my period ended, my breasts stopped aching and I am back to being my stoic self. That is too bad because I was hoping to see an increase in my bra size, even for just a little while. Instead what I am getting is a bloated tummy and gas - I know, it's really adorable. I noticed a couple of days ago that I was looking a bit thick around the middle. Thankfully, I don't think it's fat - I believe and I hope it's just water retention.

I was having hot flashes like it was my job for a couple of weeks, the strangest thing, I would be going on about my business and then it would hit, and I can't function, all I know is that it's devastatingly hot and I need it to stop. I'd get all pink and sweaty...not cute. Preview to menopause, not looking forward to it. Anyway, good news is, the hot flashes have stopped in the past few days, I think it has to do with the lower dosage of hormones, or maybe my body's learned to adapt.

All the doctors' visits are definitely making me cranky. I'm supposed to be there between 7:00am and 9:00am - are you kidding me?! I don't do mornings! The past few weeks was ok, because I was only going maybe ever 4 days or so. But this week, it's almost every day they want to take blood and do sonograms. Today, which is Turkey day eve, our office manager was supposed to have the day off, and I would cover for her, HOWEVER, the fertility clinic wanted me to come in the morning. I wrote them a very nice email explaining that I had to be at work all day from 7:30am til 5:30pm, and that I couldn't come in but that I would be happy to do so at any other time. Oh boy, I got a very angry response back from the nurse, scolding me for about 2 pages on how important these monitoring sessions are and that she went over the fact that there wouldn't be flexibility in my office visits before I started the cycle, yadda yadda yadda. So I messaged the poor, overworked office manager and she very kindly agreed to come in and cover me while I went to be monitored. So as I'm lying there with my feet in the stirrups and the doc prodding me with the sonogram stick, he's lecturing me about the importance of the office visits. OMG. I KNOW THAT. So I tried to explain that I wasn't being resistant to the visits, it's just that for the holidays, people take time off and I need to be there! GAWD!! So frustrating. I'm sure they're gonna want to see me again on Friday. I can't wait for this to be done. T-10 days (give or take a couple)!!

Fertility hormones

Since this past Friday, I've been giving myself 3 injections. Lupron, Follistim, and Menopur. Lupron, as I mentioned before, I've decreased the dosage to 5 units from 10 units.

Menopur triggers FSH and LH production in the body, it stimulates the ovaries to produce multiple follicles, which basically means I'll be more fertile. It is kind of complicated to administer, as it comes in a solid form, to be dissolved in 1ml of sodium chloride. I use a mixing cap to take the sodium chloride and transfer it into the Menopur vial, then suck up the entire content and then change the tip to a needle to inject into my tum tum. Menopur is a bit painful - it's not unbearable, but it stings and feels like a very sharp cramp. My least favorite of all three.

Follistim is a purified form of FSH - I store it in the fridge, and it's quite convenient as it comes in a pen form, and I can change the gauge at the base of the pen to administer the exact amount that I need. I thought this would feel the strangest, since the solution lives in the refrigerator and it's cold; however, it's the least weird. The needle is the biggest of the three, but I find that it's the least uncomfortable - it's probably disturbing to read this, but the needle goes in like knife through soft butter. It could cause breast tenderness, diarrhea, nausea/vomiting, constipation and hot flashes. Sure sounds like fun.

These injections leave me with some discomfort for about 20 mins afterward. It's not too bad - I keep thinking it's only for 2 weeks. Light massaging helps. Sometimes, I must not be doing it quite correctly, I find that I bleed at the injection site for a few minutes. My sharps box is getting full rapidly! Is it weird that I think that's cool?

Next big step!!

I went to the clinic to get another monitoring. It was a longer visit, with more elaborate blood work, where they took about 10 vials and ended with a sonogram. The doctor, while looking at the sonogram, exclaimed that I had beautiful ovaries, and asked the nurse to decrease the dosage of the hormones. So starting tonight, I will take half the amount of Lupron as before, and they also lowered the amount of Follistim from 175 units to 125 units. I won't start the Menopur and the Follistim until Friday, but it makes me feel better knowing that I can go through this process with less chemicals pumped into my abdomen. Just a few more days til the real hormones!!! Whoo!!!

Oh dear...

Ok, so I started having that feeling last night - the feeling you get before the special lady time of the month. That means the next big step's coming up, and SOON! Yikes!! I was watching Akeelah and the Bee last night and I don't cry easily and haven't done so in quote a while, but oh my gosh, the end of the movie left me with tears streaming down my face. Um...really?! Akeelah and the Bee?! Could it be the hormones? Maybe? I haven't had tenderness or achiness in my breasts during my period in years, but it's happening now. Updates to come!!

Day 7

It's day 7 - so 7 shots of Lupron. Not much to report really...I experienced hot flashes the first night, but that could have been induced by me, freaking myself out, expecting something to happen. For the past week, the only change I really noticed is how tired I get. Generally I'm like the Energizer bunny, I'll keep going as long as there's some kind of stimulus. Lately, I've been getting tired around 11:00pm and sleeping shortly after midnight. Lame!!

I do have a confession to make. The nurse told me that I could have about 2 drinks in one day if I wanted to have some wine with dinner or something. Ok, that's totally doable. So I've been keeping within the limits of 2 drinks/day if I had the opportunity to enjoy an adult beverage, and keeping up with the injections every night - that's pretty impressive, any of my girlfriends will tell you, I'm horrible at taking routine meds - in the case of birth control pills, I kept forgetting to take them. Once I had forgotten for 4 days and then took 5 pills in the morning and spent the whole day throwing up. Thank goodness for NuvaRing!! Anyway, so back to the confession. Friday night, my friend and I threw a party and I ended up spending the night there because I broke a major rule...I had quite a bit more than 2 drinks and it wasn't safe for me to drive, not to mention I was exhausted! Also, I didn't have the Lupron with me so I ended up taking the injection the next day early afternoon. I'm hoping it's going to work similarly to BCPs where if you forget to take it one night then you can take 2 the next day?

I feel horrible that I was so negligent that night. I promise I'll be good from now, I promise, I promise, I promise.

Here We Go!!

It's Monday - on Friday, I went in to the clinic to learn about all the medication I'll be taking, as well as how to give myself injections. First, they drew some blood to see if I was ready to begin the first round of meds. The nurse led me to a conference room where my lesson would take place, and on the way, she warned me not to panic. I couldn't help blurting out, "HOLY CRAP," when I saw what was waiting for me. There was a large paper shopping bag - if a bag that size had been filled with goodies from Banana Republic, I'd have clapped my hands and squealed with joy, HOWEVER, it was the perfect size to hold the goodies from the fertility clinic, which meant lots of hormones and syringes...so many syringes!!

The nurse was very nice and patient as she explained what everything was and I asked questions. I would start with Lupron, which is supposed to synchronize the mom and my menstrual cycles. So I'll be giving myself Lupron injections for about 2 weeks, and then I will start my monthly special lady time. After they check out my blood and sonogram, I'll start on the fertility drugs. On Lupron, I'm to expect hot flashes, which is fine for the most part, except when I work at night. I'm supposed to take the injection around 10pm every night, which means on the nights that I work, I'll have to run to the ladies' room, take injection, then deal with hot flashes as I clean up the bar. Hmmmm.

So after she explained what all the drugs were supposed to do, she pulled out the syringes and the practice carpules and I got to practice mixing and sticking. All was fine until she asked if I was ready to practice on my belly. Oh yeah, all my injections are in my tummy, an inch away from the belly button. I sat with the syringe in my hand, trembling and giggling nervously for a good couple of minutes. Mind you, the syringe is pretty small and the needle is as svelte as can be, and it's an inch long at the most, but oh-so-scary!! The nurse told me to take my time, and when I finally did it, it was easy peasy! It barely hurt, just a small prick - so I giggled for a couple more minutes from relief and then it was time for me to go home with a shopping bag full of fun.

The nurse hoped that I could start the Lupron on Friday, but unfortunately, I guess I wasn't ready yet. So I went in for another blood work today, and I got the green light to start the shots!! So 10:00pm rolled around and I tried to keep calm as I wiped my belly with an alcohol swab. I took the injection as practiced, and it went smoothly. Phew. I don't know if I'm imagining hot flashes or if I'm actually having them, but it sure it hot in here. I think I'll go and take a cold shower.